Kanye West-  Sublimely Self-Righteous Ale from Stone Brewery:

• As if the name didn’t say it all, the image of the devil with angel wings on the front of the bottle perfectly reflects the fine balance between charm and idiocy that Kanye so epitomizes.  This was the first Black IPA on the market and, like Kanye, its appearance on the scene ignited a trend that has been copied, repackaged, and ripped off.  If only beer consumers could illegally download Stone’s beer, it would have to be renamed My Sublimely Self-Righteous Fantasy.  Stone’s Self-Righteous has enough bitter hop kick to knock any chincy Taylor Swift beer off the block but retains a sweet balance from the dark malts to allow it to sit comfortably on the shelves of any Billboard Hot 100 beer buyer out there.

Eminem- Nemesis from Founders Brewery:

• Just like Detroit’s troubled son, Founder’s Nemesis reinvents itself every year.  The brewery’s claim that “you never know what you’re gonna get” should be stickered on every Eminem album the moment it exits the press.   One year, it may come equipped with enough bitter fire to assault your senses and sit on the shelves, another year it could find enough balance to find its way on every Top 10 chart in the industry.   Just like Em, the most recent effort has gone triple-platinum.   See our Top 2010 American Beer list to find it holding down the #2 spot.

Bono- Save our Shores Ale from Abita Brewery:

• Bono donates his millions to relief efforts the world around.  Louisiana’s Abita Brewery doesn’t have millions to donate, but it’s pooling your beer-buying dollars to contribute to the Gulf Relief Effort.   Bono’s U2 has dropped a few dogs on the music industry in the band’s 300 years of existence.  To further the comparison, the Big Easy’s Strawberry Harvest Ale is Abita’s Zooropa.  Heavy drugs must have contributed to the creation of both.  You told yourself last Christmas that Bono’s red iPod you bought fulfilled your annual charity.  Use the same justification this year as you slam a bomber of Abita’s SOS ale.

Justin Bieber: Watermelon Wheat from 21^st Amendment:

• Usher demolished the little street-cred he previously held by putting this Similac-fueled nightmare on the streets.  San Fran’s 21^st Amendment also strayed a bit from the mark by placing Watermelon Wheat next to their Brew Free or Die IPA, Monks Blood, or Back in Black (all great).  Although the girls may go gaga if you roll a keg of this into your next apartment party, just like Bieber’s fans, they are not old enough to drink anyway.    Don’t stroll up to the jukebox and call-up Bieber; don’t belly up to the bar and order a watermelon beer.   For the record, this will be Justin’s favorite drink in 17 years when he is “of age”.

Matisyahu- Jewbelation from He’Brew Brewery:

He may rock the yamaka and beard, but just like He’Brew’s  Jewbelation, a Hasidic fire waits within.   Like Matisyahu in a “rap battle”, at 14% alcohol by volume, this “chosen beer” will knock you out of your Temple shoes.   Both ‘Yahu and Jewbelation are out of sight and out of mind all but a few months a year when they wake from hibernation to bring joy to all religious faiths. 

This offering from HUB (Hopworks Urban Brewery) located in Portland, OR clocks in 5.8% abv and an IBU of 60 making this no ordinary red ale.  As with most things in the Northwest this beer doesn’t slack on a strong hop profile but don’t let this deter you from enjoying the well crafted balance of this red ale.

The color is ruby red leaving a thick khaki color head that sticks with this beer.  The aroma is sweet upfront, caramel, toffee, some citrus and piney accents as well.  The taste is puckering on the palate at first then moves to a sweet bready caramel sweetness that helps balance this offering making it quite enjoyable.  I’ve noticed a few “NW Red Ale” styles out here and this is one of the better offerings of this style and I would welcome this in my glass anytime.

Cheers, Frank

The fratster favorite “Irish Car Bomb” shot of Jameson Irish Whisky and Bailey’s Irish Cream dropped into half pint of Guinness is an obvious affront to Ireland’s religion-based terrorist activity.   Poor this concoction down your gullet (and partially on the sleeveless Notre Dame shirt you are wearing) all you want, just call it a Irish Boilermaker at the local pub,  tip well, and promptly step back to your table of giggling post-grads and “brahs”.  Better to bring home the girl than a busted jaw from that guy at the bar that did care. 

The less apparent affront to Irish culture is the “Black and Tan”.  Apart from a popular mixture of Guiness and Harp, this name refers to Royal Irish Constabulary Reserve Force who in the 1920’s got nasty by attacking a load of Irish civilians mistaken for IRA (Irish Republican Army) terrorists.   These buggers didn’t quite steal the hearts of Ireland’s pub-going population, so best not to celebrate them with the equivalent of a “Heaven’s Gate” or “Jonestown”.   We are splitting hairs on this one, but it’s best to instead order a “Half and Half” with Harp and Guinness.

Drink politically correct-ish this weekend.

Your girl got accosted by a troop of hard-selling pre-teens.  Your boy brought his daughter into the office and you had to go in on at least 2 boxes to save face.  The last time you had cookies at your place was when you were living with Mom and Dad and you don’t know why or how you are going to consume a half dozen boxes of cheap baked goods. 

Make this crime of underhanded childhood marketing alright by pairing your Girl Scout Cookies with beer.   Hooch & Hops teamed up with Los Angeles’ Beer Chicks for their recommendation on a few Girl Scout “Cookie” and brew pairings.   This should get you through at least 2 sleeves of your newly adopted junk food craze.   

Caramel DeLites + CoCoNut Porter, Maui Brewing Co., Lahaina, Hawaii. 5.7% ABV.  – These cookies have a crunchy base, rich chewy caramel, sugary coconut, and sweet chocolate.  They may be the perfect cookie.  What better to pair with these than a porter made with toasted coconut featuring notes of coffee and vanilla?!

Tagalongs + Banana Bread Beer, Wells & Young’s Ltd., UK. 5.2% ABV. – Tagalongs are those delicious cookies topped with Reces Pieces-like peanut butter and covered in chocolate.  Banana seemed like the perfect flavor accompaniment, (if you love honey banna peanut butter sandwiches as much as we do!) so we chose Wells’ ale, which is basically banana bread in liquid form; caramel, banana, nuts and biscuit.

Lemon Chalet Creams + Framboise Lambic, Brouwerij Lindemans, Belgium. 4% ABV. – For those who love fruit tarts with custard and lemon meringue pie, this is a pairing that will please.  These cookies with a creamy lemon center are pushed to new levels when paired with a bubbly, tart, sweet rasberry Lambic. 

Thin mints + Hitachino Nest Espresso Stout, Kiuchi Brewery, Japan. 7.5% ABV. – The Thin Mint is a masterpiece on its own, but paired with this thick stout from one of our favorite breweries out of Japan, the thin mint takes on another level of decadence.  The minty chocolate mixed with coffee is like a peppermint mocha, and carries the kick of coffee and alcohol.  We can polish off a whole box of thin mints no problem, and this is the perfect beer with which to wash those babies down!

Shortbread + Old Rasputin Russian Imperial Stout, North Coast Brewing Co., Ft. Bragg, CA. 9% ABV. - if you haven’t dipped a cookie into a glass of Old Rasputin, you haven’t lived!  Seriously, this beer was made for dessert, it has that complex bitter baking chocolate espresso flavor from the dark roasted malt, and enough alcohol to make it a fitting night cap.  Great on ice-cream, the bitterness of this beer is the perfect balance to any sugary substance with notes of vanilla.  The classic Girl Scout Shortbread brings that sugary, buttery vanilla goodness in spades.  Go ahead dunk that cookie and taste heaven!

Source: The Beer Chicks

Late last year, a grass roots Brewery tournament was hosted on BeerAdvocate.com.   Involved was a 4 week voting process in which the blog’s readers submitted votes for their favorite US Brewery in a 32 slot bracket.   Out of the 1,600 breweries in existence within our great states, 32 stepped up to the plate as participants.   West Coast standouts such as Deschutes and Russian River went toe to toe with the Midwest’s prized Surly and New Glarus.  Florida even managed to squeeze in an entrant with the cult favorite Cigar City Brewery. 

The West put up a good fight with Sierra Nevada, Russian River, and Stone scrapping their way into the Elite 8.  Despite featuring a newly minted TV star head brewer Sam Caglione, Dogfish Head got dusted by the classic contender Sierra Nevada for a spot in the final four.  But, the final pair was all Michigan.  That’s absurd, but when the digital dust settled and around 500 votes were cast in the final bout between Bell’s and Founders, it was Kalamazoo’s Bell’s that emerged from the ring. 

For a full breakdown of each bout, take a look at the official link:

http://www.bracketmaker.com/tmenu.cfm?tid=380652

For Bell’s hottest beer on the market this new year, grab a bottle of their Hopslam Double IPA.  Pumped with loads of cannibus’ cousin (hops) and fortified with a bit of fresh honey, this season offering is currently knocking socks off bitter-barons nationwide.   

This Saturday, a contingent of the H&H Collective visited Orange, California for The Bruery’s annual Reserve Society Initiation Party.  Tickets to this event were collected by dropping two bills for The Bruery’s Reserve Membership or being a plus one of one of these high-rollers.   Twenty-three of So-Cal’s diamond brewery’s rarest productions were flowing freely out of taps guarded by lock and key.  Unfortunately, expletives of frustration and anger were also flowing freely out of attendees’ mouths after waiting in 1 hour lines to receive 2oz pours of these beers.   To put it nicely, this logistical nightmare made waiting in a 2-hour “It’s a Small World” line for the third time in one Disneyland visit seem like a worthwhile investment of time.   The beer served at the event, including The Bruery’s 18% Chocolate Rain and Melange #3, fell under the “once in a lifetime” category.   If it takes what seemed like a lifetime standing in line to try these brews, I’m not going to lose any sleep over not trying them again.     

For more information on the event itself, check your second favorite beer blog for violent rants and an official apology from Bruery owner Patrick Rue.  We at H2 would like to remove ourselves from this slamjam and speak of a lesson learned at the event.  At a dog-eat-dog booze gather, we at Hooch & Hops learned that sharing is survival.  In order to endure this event, members of the group adopted a divide and conquer approach.  We had folks waiting in the Chocolate Rain line, the “nobody really wants those beers, but get them anyways” line, the bathroom line, even the Vegan Taco Truck line.  Free agents not currently in line would scramble to whatever sentry had reached the front of a queue and squeeze in to fill up on whatever came dripping out of the tap, flying out the roach coach window, or… going in to the bathroom.  Mass sharing of purloined goods would promptly commence.  It was cheating, but this was an every man for himself event and cutthroat tactics were embraced by all. Instead of waiting in lines for one tasting, H&H members simultaneously waited in 6 lines for dozens of tastings. 

After sharing food truck cuisine, 2oz samples, and good will with many, I walked away with a head cold and a hangover.  I probably wouldn’t have had either of these if I didn’t have friends to infect me with both winter germs and alcohol.  I also wouldn’t have had the chance to try dozens of flavors that I will never try again;  I wouldn’t have gotten my money’s worth;  and, I wouldn’t have been able to enjoy what was, logistically, a complete cluster. 

Because of sharing, I will not be one of the hundreds of zealots tearing The Bruery apart on beer blogs for poor forecasting of attendance and crowd dynamics.  Along  with stumbling away convinced that The Bruery is producing some of the best Belgian inspired ales in the United States, I also walked away convinced that life lessons can be found in 2oz pours of 36-proof brew.   Drink Better, and share a few of The Bruery’s more available offerings.

Mischief-

At 8.5% ABV, Mischief is a Hoppy Belgian-Style Golden Strong Ale. This wickedly good golden ale is fiendishly dry-hopped with American hops to add a layer of complexity and mystery to its fruity, dry Belgian-style character. Citrus and resin diabolically combine with ripe melon, pear and slight peppery spice in a precariously effervescent mixture. 

Saison Rue-

Saison Rue is an unfiltered, bottle conditioned, Belgian/French-style farmhouse ale. This is a beer of subtlety and complexity, with malted rye, spicy, fruity yeast notes, biscuit-like malt backbone, and a slight citrus hop character. With age, this beer will dry out and will become more complex with rustic notes of leather and earth from the contribution of a wild yeast strain.

The Micro Mile High Club- A few of the smaller airlines have decided to buck the Bud On Board model within the last year.  As more and more craft breweries embrace cans as their container of choice, more and more air carriers wizen up to the potential to serve more than barley-water macro-beers on board.  Along with your $300 safety belted straight jacket of a seat, you can pay another $7 for a nice can of brew.   Here are a few of the all-stars:

• Alaska Airlines- Alaskan Amber
• Virgin Airlines- 21^st Amendment Brew Free or Die IPA
• Hawaiian Airlines- Maui Brewing Company Bikini Blonde Lager

Airport Bars Get Toney- Now that delays have folks decaying in concourses for 72 hour periods, many airports are now installing beer hotspots to numb the pain.  Were Tom Hanks to get locked in the Terminal of today’s airports, he wouldn’t even think of setting foot on the mean streets of NYC.   These airports now have way better beer bars that “Krakozia”: 

• Boston Logan International- Harpoon Brewpub
• Chicago O’ Hare- Goose Island Brewing Company
• Denver International- New Belgium Brewing Company (Bar- “The Hub)
• Los Angeles and San Diego International- Karl Strauss Brewing Company

Flight Attendants Acting the Fool- Earlier this year, everyone’s favorite freak-show flight attendant grabbed a bottle of Blue Moon to swig as he threw away his lifelong career for a fast escape on the emergency slide.  Flight attendant went down, street cred of Blue Moon went up.   Even if it fueled one of the airline industry’s most thuggish moments, H2 doesn’t recommend Blue Moon to boost one’s testosterone levels.  Drink Better with a Lost Coast Great White, Blanche de Bruxelles, or Allagash White.

With the snow aggressively working to bury our Ford Explorer outdoors, we tucked ourselves in to the Tahoe bar for a sampling of Fifty Fifty’s best. 

Our friendly bartender who goes by the name “Shaggy” perfectly played his role of the ski-bum bar man.   Yeah, he may have driven a 74’ Bronco for a few years and has the “just out of bed” look down pat, but why play into the clichés?   Despite the questionable alias, The Shag was extremely helpful and happy to fortify us with information and brew.  We tried the whole range of Fifty’s offerings, from the Foggy Goggles Belgian White to their aptly-named Eclipse Barrel Aged Stout.  Hailed by Draft Magazine as one of the Top Beers in the World, Eclipse is the diamond of the Sierra Nevada Mountain Range.  This “blot out the sun” beer is aged in liquor barrels to impose a bit of additional flavor and warming heat appropriate for the snowy environs which it calls home.   Sets aged in Four Roses or Evan Williams Bourbon, Heaven Hill Rye Whisky, and Christian Brothers Brandy barrels are some of the most highly coveted and least available brews in the country.  Each bottle is hand numbered and dipped in colored wax to designate the barrel of origin.  If you see this bottled poetry on shelves, remove it promptly.  If you want to trade us for a bottle or two, Hooch & Hops is on the market for angel investors. 

 All tolled, A happy hour jaunt “right around the corner” from our Tahoe cabin turned into a 4 hour test of our SUV’s 4 wheel drive capabilities and our gang’s patience.    A chain checkpoint materialized a stone’s throw away from our snow bungalow, effectively halting traffic for the majority of the 6 miles back from Fifty Fifty.   Without the saving grace of an IPhone’s YouTube capabilities, this would have quickly turned into a rehash of the Donner Party’s cannibalistic frenzy.   Instead, our resident Ad Exec dropped a few web gems on us.  In the end, the 4 hour tour was well worth the time sacrificed making snow angels and sipping hot toddies in front of the fire.  Coors can continue to tap the Rockies, our pint glass will remain underneath Tahoe’s spigot.   Next time you head to the Sierras, consider forgoing the $8 Coors Light on the mountain for a lights-out pint of Fifty Fifty’s Eclipse.

Russian River has apparently expanded its fanbase beyond the BeerAdvocate cannibals.  Dropping in to a brewpub on a rainy Sunday afternoon, we expected a half dozen droopy-eyed denizens chatting it up with the bartender over a pint.  We received a shrug and a shouted, “35 minutes for a table” from the hostess over the uproar of a couple hundred cheery drinkers.  Although the “bar is free”… the bar wasn’t free and probably hadn’t been since the doors opened at 11am.   About half the populace was wearing the team uniform: RR T-Shirts or sweatshirts calling out Damnation or Pliny the Elder.   Our country-club polo’s concealed under dripping rain coats didn’t blend with local wildlife.  One in our party’s order of a caeser salad raised eyebrows of the waiter accustomed to pulling out more pizzas than a post-Tee Ball Pizza Party.  She paid the $3 extra for chicken, though, so he can button it up.  Snapping photographs of the environment wasn’t out of place, however.  This was a beer shrine.

A half hour in, our beer sampler arrived.  Stocked full of 15 of the on-tap selections, this behemoth had to be air lifted in by helicopter.   Once it hit the tarmac the feast began.   Pliny, Blind Pig, Damnation, Consecration, and another dozen beers that all top the charts rested like bullets in a beer bandalero before us.   Like the Lost Boys in Hook, this buffet quickly became “ghost” as our gang laid into it.  Our Patagonia rain coats didn’t protect from the envious looks at our groups’ luck at snagging one of the tasting platters.  Blind taste tests to challenge the buds of the beer-acute resulted in an impeachment of one’s credibility.   RR’s IPAs have the bitterness to blast anyone’s pallet. Their sour Wild Beers pucker like Wally Warhead.   And, although those in the H&H group had yet to sprout pallets as refined as the BeerAdvocate loyal, we could appreciate these relatively extreme beers for their artistic merit.

These brews were caviar when we would have been pleased with smoked salmon.  But , for less than $4 a pint, it was as if nobody had told Russian River that their caviar was more than just fish eggs.   In sum, this was the best scene ever witnessed at a brewpub and we would stongly encourage everyone to Drink Better at Russian River Brewery.  Next time you are in the Napa Valley, detour from the cookie-cutter wineries, forget to shave in the morning, and let loose on some pizza and Pliny at Russian River Brewery.   Don’t take BeerAdvocate’s word for it.  Take ours.

As winter is officially hitting the Northwest, the fire is going and I am about to crack open a bottle of Hair of the Dog’s winter release “Doggie Claws” it got me thinking.  I love brewery seasonal releases because they tend to bring out the best in that brewery.  In 2007 a special release of Lagunita’s Undercover Shutdown Ale was created when the brewery was shutdown for 30 days because marijuana was smoked at one of their events.  They came back with a vengeance creating a double IPA clocking in at 9.9% abv that packed a hoppy west coast punch, it was as bitter and angry as the Ke$ha fans who defend her singing.

Over the past decade consumers of craft beer have been clamoring for more and the movement toward focusing on these annual and seasonal releases of these Barrel-aged, tribute series, or special event brews is greater than ever to the point that some of these releases have their own friggin day!  “Hey honey, I am taking the day off from work to wake up at 4am and sit in line for a bottle of beer, watch the kid’s…peace!”  But this excitement does tend to allow the brewer creative freedom and more often than not the brewery discovers a successful recipe.

The shame of this is that some of these beers are “one-off” releases meaning you’ll never see them again making it even more enticing to pick up the bottle so you can try these sometimes crazy creations.  Although I love the anticipation of trying the new Sam Adam’s Infinium or Brewdog’s 41% abv sink the Bismarck I’ve also come to look forward to a few standard beers I must have every winter, so here,  in no particular order are some of my favorite brewery winter seasonals I look forward to getting my hands on this time of the year.

1. Sierra Nevada Brewing – Celebration
2. New Belgium Brewing – 2 Below
3. Hair of the Dog – Doggie Claws
4. Deschutes Brewery – The Abyss
5. Dogfish Head Brewery – World Wide Stout
6. Sam Adams – Old Fezziwig
7. Stone Brewing – Old Guardian Barleywine
8. Brooklyn Brewery – Black Chocolate Stout
9. Founders Brewing – Imperial Stout
10. Great Divide – Espresso Oak Aged Yeti

Cheers, Frank